My Birth story - Part 2

After it all fizzling out the night before, I got woken up at 3.30am with cramps and needing to go to the toilet.

This time the cramps became more intense and more regular, so got in the shower, dimmed the lights, had the affirmations going. Hubby started to get a few things ready just in case and come in to the bathroom every now and then. He then also started with anchor touch points and water on my back, started timing and realised, oh, they’re 3 min apart 😅 Hubby wanted to call his parents over but I didn’t think this was labour, it wasn’t as “painful” as last time so I said to him, if this continues for half an hour we’ll call the birth unit and get their advice.

Half an hour passed! Hubby called them and explained everything but I think they didn’t believe him, because they wanted to talk to me. He also had already explained we were hypnobirthing. The midwife asked me about the surges (not pain, because we don’t call it that) and I said the pressure is getting stronger. She asked me how often they’re happening. At one point I had to stop mid sentence and said hold on, there’s one coming. I had practiced my surge breathing and knew at the very max it would only last a minute, so I kept repeating the affirmation in my head- I can do anything for one minute. I think the midwife kept me talking because she was timing too.

Midwife must have known it was going to ramp up. She then asked us to have everything ready, including someone to watch the kids, in case we needed to get to the hospital. We called Merv’s parents over to mind our toddler and teenager. They came about 4.30am and after packing a few things and stopping to breathe through a few contractions, off we were. Affirmations kept playing through my ear phones while Merv was driving- I didn’t want him falling asleep from being so calm 😂. I found that there was one particular part of the affirmations track that was best for me. The narrator counted slowly down from 10-1 and I found I liked knowing about the progress I was making, and that a break was coming. The surges came and they felt like waves. In the course you’re told to ride the wave and visualise yourself lifting up and over the wave. I found this really helped me- because once you were at the top, I knew that the intensity would taper off at the other end of the wave. It didn’t make sense until I was in labour and feeling the waves that the visualisation from the course made sense.

About 5am we got to the hospital. In hindsight we probably could have stayed longer at home. But I was nervous about the surges being so close to each other. At this point they intensified but wern’t “painful”.

We entered through emergency and my husband explained that the birth unit was expecting us. The triage nurse called the wardsman to come and take us to the birth unit.

Getting to the hospital about 5am, surges about 3-5 min apart. I don’t look too bad haha.

We waited a few minutes and some people saw me leaning over the chair and swaying my hips. But I was so calm, they were a little surprised. They just wished me an encouraging “good luck” and went about their day.

I was still surging when the wardsman arrived, but was in a break so thought I could walk it. That didn’t last very long 😂 Got in the wheelchair and off to birth unit we went. Merv was talking to the wardsman about the hospital and his shift that night (something about the lifts being weird and only one arriving at a time so that in case there’s an emergency one was on hand - haha- yes I was in labour but it wasn’t “painful” so I was very aware of what was happening- was even talking to the dude while we were on the way!)

Met the midwife and she asked for our birth plan, or we call them birth preferences. Merv said she read them really quickly and knew what to do. Meanwhile Merv was preparing the room, bath filling, diming lights, setting up speakers. The midwife asked if I wanted a birth ball. I said Yes - Hip circles got me through pregnancy.

The birth suite at the SAN was quite nice. I ended up labouring alot of the time looking out the window to the national park. It helped me visualise my “happy place” and got me through the surges. My happy place was a lake in Puerto Varas in Chile, South America, where we were for a wedding a few years ago. I pictured myself there, everything from what I felt on my skin (I remember it being fresh and cool from the mountain air) to how nauseated I was - because I was in my first trimester with Jayden and had awesome morning sickness lol. It all helped me get through.

At 6am the nurse wanted me to lay on the bed to get a trace. It was in my preferences that I wanted to be mobile during labour, so asked for doppler monitoring instead. The nurse, almost apologetically, said it would be good to get a trace for the doctor, and said if we can get a good one in 10 min (as opposed to the normal 20-30 min) that will be enough.

I really struggled to stay still on the bed for the trace because surges were stronger and quicker this time. After 3 waves I said to Merv I can’t stay still anymore and he told the nurse, and she said she would undo the chords. Another thing about the hypnobirthing course I forgot to mention - it really empowers the birth partner. Merv knew what to do, what to say, and he was the contact person. The nurses knew this too, and spoke to him before speaking to me. It was great - because I was in no state to be answering any questions! It was also good because when you’re in labour you don’t make objective decisions and are more likely to make decisions you might regret.

After that until about 9am - I don’t really remember much. It was a haze of moving from the shower, the ball, to the window and all three back again. At one point I tried the bath but I hated it. I also borrowed a Tens machine. It worked a little but wasn’t as amazing as I hoping it would be 😂.

When the surges stepped up again in intensity the midwife suggested I get in the bath. I was happy to try anything at that point so did. It helped. I also started to get really shitty with the affirmations tracks - haha - they were all positive polly and I was getting annoyed at it. I did not feel amazing! The surges were tough! Midwife suggested playing music instead. I knew the perfect band - Boyce Avenue. They play acoustic covers that we love. This was much better. But woah the surges we’re stepping up.

At this point I had my first transition. Tears started streaming down my face and I said couldn’t do this and I wanted the epidural. And I totally knew this would happen, so I told Merv weeks ago that if I say this, he needed to remind me that I don’t need it. He reminded me, but I told Merv no, it’s bad, I needed it! He asked the midwife and she had a good suggestion - to do an internal exam and see how far we are and make a decision from there.

She told me I was 8-9cms. This was the second wind I needed. I had got to 9cms without any paid relief! I was pretty bloody proud of myself! Once I had this moment of clarity, I realised I still had one more tool up my sleeve, and that was gas. The midwife started it off really light, and it gave me the edge I needed. I hated the gas last time with Jayden - it made me feel dizzy and out of control. But induction labour is different. Induction surges get really strong really quickly, where as this time I had worked my way up and my body had time to prepare for it.

The gas took the edge off. Even to the point that Merv and I were singing to Boyce Avenue in between surges. We were harmonising and it was beautiful. I wish we had a birth photographer to capture it! I breathed in the gas during surges and took a break from it when they tapered off. It also helped to have something to hold, and squeeze during the surges even when I wasn’t breathing in the gas. I remember the midwife was feeling my tummy as a surge came and went. I remember her saying, okay so that’s the end of one surge now, right? I said yes, but actually it finished a minute earlier. That tells me that through the coping techniques of water, breathing and at the end the gas, I wasn’t feeling the “pain” of the entire surge.

It was about 9.30am and at this point my OB had joined us. I joked when she arrived and said to her “I guess we don’t need that stretch and sweep anymore” and everyone laughed. Merv told me that the midwives and my OB came in and out of the room but I was in the zone I didn’t notice.

At this point I was fully dilated, but my waters haddn’t broken. I was a little bit worried about this. We thought we may have a really rare En Caul birth - where bub would be born still in his amniotic sac.

I kept labouring on and another hour or so passed. It was all very intense but I was hazy, in and out of because of the gas. There was one point where I think I fell asleep but I was woken up by the OB saying that my surges had really spaced out.

The way that it was said made me worried. Why were they spaced out? Is something wrong?

The OB told Merv that because of this we have two options. We keep going as we are and not know when it all was going to happen (could be hours) or the midwives can break my waters. I wanted to keep going - so the OB and midwives said because I was fully dilated, I should try and push.

Our main midwife knew that we didn’t want this type of coaching. So she said “Go with your body,. If you feel the urge to push, give a little push”

From the course I knew that the urge to push wasn’t voluntary. But because this was my first natural birth, I didn’t know what this urge to push was. Was I feeling it? Was I not? I felt a little urge.. but again, I really didn’t know. So I listened to them and tried. I was on all fours and tried to push like I was doing a poo. (Legit that’s how they tell you to practice!) A few of these tries and I nicely told the midwife, look the urge is not there.

Kept trying and after a few “good” pushes - so that midwife told me - apparently I wasn’t really progressing. The OB then says she thinks its time we break waters. She explained later that apparently I wasn’t getting the urge because the waters were blocking it, and bub was trying to get out but couldn’t because the waters were in the way.

Now, hindsight is 20/20, and I will never know if the urge to push would have come a minute later or in 12 hours. Tina told me later that the part when my surges “spaced out” actually is somewhat common - and it’s called the “rest and be thankful” phase. It’s your body giving you some time to rest and prepare for the final phase of active labour.

Now, had I known this, I would have just kept on labouring and got my 100% natural birth. And in the days after birth I was pissed that this info wasn’t given to me. Had I been in a midwife led program or had a doula, I would have probably been told this. I don’t blame the OB, she’s only giving me the info she’s trained in. She is a surgeon after all - she’s trained to see the problems and worst possible scenario. She told me later that it would have been “cruel” to let me keep on labouring. I don’t know about this - I could have found more in me if I was told about the rest and be thankful phase.

Anyway, after we had these options told to us, the midwife said, lets make our way to the bed - sometimes the walk to the bed is enough to break the waters.

Got to the bed, nothing, so decided to break waters.

Apparently it was was super fast after that, Merv said the midwife told him to quickly push the button to call everyone to say its happening now!

Ok so this part I will call painful. Breaking waters is an intervention after all. It makes everything super intense. I got the bearing down urge and remember actually being really scared. Everything was burning! (I know this now but this was the ring of fire - it means bub was crowning!) I remember turning in to my own coach - it was an out of body experience. My body was there, but my brain wasn’t. My calm voice was telling myself, it’s okay, Merv is there, you now have to surrender and trust them. I remember closing my eyes and going really primal - sounds and everything - grunting, shouting, bearing down. The midwives took my hand in between a surge and I could feel bubs head coming through. I also remember hearing my OB saying he’ll be on your chest in about two seconds!

Sure enough, he was. Christopher Hatumale-Uy was born at 12.32pm. 3.1kg, 50cm tall and with lungs that could rival the sirens of a fire truck.

In our birth preferences we opted for no Syntocinon (the injection to deliver the placenta quicker) and wanted to deliver the placenta naturally. Merv said apparently they were preparing it and he intervened. Another point to hypnobirthing to empower the birth partner :) Merv said they gently pulled the chord - they’re not supposed to apparently, but I didn’t know this at the time. TBH I didn’t mind, I was in a haze - equal parts euphoria and exhaustion!

Apart from breaking of waters, I got my natural birth. We didn’t have a rare En Caul birth, but apparently it was still rare - because he slipped out so fast he tied a knot in his own chord!

I had a grade 1 tear. We probably could have left it but OB gave me one tiny stitch.
Chris and I reaped the benefits of having a natural birth afterwards. I was walking an hour later and after a two hour nap I was okay. Breastfeeding was easy, and Chris is a champion feeder (6kgs at 2 months! Even the paed was impressed haha). The best thing was I never really got the baby blues.

Totally no science behind it but I think having a drug free birth also affected bub - Chris is much more alert that I remember Jayden being, and is super strong - he rolled over at 6 weeks.

If I was to do it all again I would definitely do a caseload midwife program. If something does go wrong I’d want OB support, so I’d want them to be accessible, But in the lead up I’d definitely want more of midwife presence, and the stats support this. I was reading that at my hospital, I was only 1 of 18% of spontaneous vaginal births- the rest were inductions or cesareans. In a midwife program, it’s over 85%! (Scroll down to see the infographic) Pretty crazy. Though, it would amazing if they had a midwife led program but private hospital after care, someone should invent this haha. Those next few days post birth I needed all the help I could get!

Some people get the “omg that was amazing, I want to do it again” euphoric feeling post birth. I didn’t. For weeks after the birth I felt ripped off that I didn’t get that moment, and maybe a little PTSD from the intensity that came with breaking waters (and my body not being ready.) What I did get though, was knowing what my body was capable of - and it’s bloody amazing! It took me a little while to realise.. but that was the biggest benefit of all❤️